How Women at Midlife Can Reinvent Themselves

“You as a healthy woman in Midlife are different from women of previous generations at the same age: you feel younger and still beautiful, take better care of yourself, enjoy higher self-esteem and have great experience in the larger world. You have lots to give and there is no stopping you.” ~Suzanne Braun Levine Get Paid to Take Surveys

I agree with Suzanne Braun Levine’s opinion that fifty is not the new thirty, but rather fifty is rather a new fifty. You don’t need to feel you are thirty; you are the new fifty and feeling great. You are setting a new standard for the women in Midlife who are fifty, sixty and seventy.

You, as a Midlife woman today, see aging as a positive process that invites you to rethink what aging means. You think of aging more in terms of maturing. You are taking more responsibility for your own health, and spending more time than in your thirties to take care of your body: you are more careful about what you eat and drink, and exercise regularly.

As a healthy Midlife woman, you make sure that you get enough loving touch and enjoy giving lots of loving touch. You know that loving touch increases production of the love hormone, oxcytocin. You are aware that making love plays a very important role in keeping you more positive, being in better shape, retaining your memory, and improving your skin…just to mention a few benefits. You may also spend time in meditation, and you consciously bring newness into your life. You experience a healthier, sharper and more flexible mind and a healthier, vibrant body.

In the East, older people are more respected. Old people are actually revered. I was stunned when I heard my Chinese friend say: “We believe that if a person has lived even one day longer than we do, they have acquired one day more knowledge of life.” In the West, many young people seem to think of older people as someone “over the hill” or no longer “useful.”

Many young people think they are smarter because they grew up with laptops and cell phones in their cribs. They still don’t realize that there is more to life than technology. Yes, technology is very useful, but it does not make you a wiser or happier person. More informed, yes, but not really more connected on a heart level. As a Midlife woman, you learn how to re-create yourself. You may learn technology more slowly than younger people, but you have acquired a treasure of wisdom that younger people have yet to accrue, and you are eager to share it as you yourself learn.

You know that you need to be touched more than to ‘be in touch.

Conscious, loving relating with each other contributes more to personal happiness than tons of information. As a matter of fact, too much information can sometimes create anxiety, especially when it comes to choosing. You may feel anxiety that you haven’t done enough research before choosing a product or service. When I grew up there was less availability of styles and models of things and it was easier to compare and feel like you made a good decision after a few minutes of research.


How can you, a wise woman in Midlife, make yourself heard if you are not a famous actress, singer, or politician? One of your opportunities to contribute might be volunteering your work for a while, or finding young people in your circle of friends and family who look up to you and then nurturing the relationship with them. Soon they are going to tell their friends that you answer all the questions they have without making them feel stupid and you will have soon a large mentorship. Then you could take that further perhaps and give workshops, if you are so inclined. If you love writing, you might express your wisdom that way. It is good to learn new avenues of expression. It keeps your mind sharp and youthful.

You can also join a woman's group, or attend a midlife or Baby Boomer women's workshop where you will meet other women with similar desires to brainstorm and create new friendships with. Giving and receiving counseling has a special importance: books help to open the mind of the reader to the availability of experiential knowledge, however the actual transmission of knowledge happens through personal interaction – through workshops. Until intellectual knowledge becomes integrated on a body level, it cannot really create a real change in your life.

There is actually a perfect fit. Young people need mature guidance and we have a need to give it. As a Midlife woman I have taken stock of my assets and then put together my special package of knowledge, which I share. I invite you to do the same thing. You can rest assured that as you see the results of your contribution to others, wrinkles become less important and sagging breasts become more full of love.

Carla Tara, author, educator, and intimacy coach, provides couples and singles with the help they need to create lasting, deep relationships. Her Booming Relationships workshop shows Baby Boomer couples how to juice up their sex lifes and redefine their intimate connection in a life after children and work. .